January 6, 2012

I want to say that I am no longer all about the money. That might be obvious as I am dirt poor right now. At one time I was earning 18 times my current earnings. I am not proud of either my motivation, or what I did to earn it. I clawed, wrangled and I, lets say, avoided the truth. I didn't outright lie, but I didn't exactly disclose all I knew, either.

My motivation to excel? To best my ex husband, who passed away a few years after I earned my top dollar, and to prove to my father that I could be a success. My father who had already passed several years earlier. The father that said that a secretary or a hairdresser were good careers for a woman. Did I best my ex? Yes at the tune of about 30K more than his top earnings.

I had a lot of good and bad experiences where I went, and I guess I'm glad I did it. I am kind of sad about my motivation though.

Late last night after I wrote my January 5^th entry, I decided to apply for an Artisan Feature on the site I sell at. I've been thinking about this for a few years and I finally did it. I can't believe how motivated I am. Maybe it's just because you are watching. All 8 of you who are following this post now. Lets see if I can get a few more interested. Just to let you know, it only took about 90 minutes to complete the application. Fortunately I already had a picture the correct size. I'll let you know if it's accepted, and when and where it will be posted.

I've also decided, that the best way to show my many designs to a potential client or employer, is to make a website for that too, with password protected pages of my designs, or maybe a flash player, so that they aren't on the screen too long. I'll have to work on that too.

I did not really exercise today. I even ate a little candy. I had to babysit most of the morning, run the taxi in the afternoon and I hate to exercise late. If I do, I won't sleep well. Maybe I'll do some strength, not aerobic. I guess I did more than I thought yesterday. My hip muscles hurt. I'm trying some yoga to stretch them out. The warrior pose is fantastic for hip flexors. Mine stiffen up when I exercise.

I did make a decision on yarn and I can't wait to get it. Eco friendly Bamboo Wool blend. I love the idea of bamboo. It is the best renewable resource. Bamboo is strong, durable, and you can make just about anything out of it. I ordered Green for Leaves and Ivory for Bridal Lace. Can't wait to make some new pieces. I'm going to crochet headbands too. I do wish I could make a living off my Jewelry and the Felt flowers, because that's what I love the most. C'mon people love my flowers as much as I do and buy, buy, buy!.

Funny, I've always said that you should make what people will buy, not just what you like. Somehow I have to combine what will sell with my love. I know I need to focus more on wedding pieces, fascinators, and even bouquets.

I need to force myself to try the New CAD program next week. I have to do some new designs. Maybe doing drawings on the CAD is what I need to to “change” everything. We'll see.